A student walked into my office today and just said "sectum sepra" like it was a hello.
Me: Why did you say that? Be careful with that... I don't want anyone bleeding on my floor because of your sectum sepra.
Student: I don't know.
You can tell we are a week away from the end of the school year. I cannot wait to be released, and at the same time HOW IN THE WORLD CAN THIS BE? Where did time go? Didn't I just arrange my desk a little while ago? It's strange because I was counting down to the end of first post grad year, but I was not keeping track of the school year. I'm almost done with one term of service and gearing up for another. Soon my students will be on their way to college and waiting to see me cry at graduation.
They really want to see me cry. Let lose another sectum sepra and I might...
love,
hannah
Thursday, May 30, 2013
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Dear one year,
The first thing I thought when I woke up today was, "I've got to call my mom."
The second thing I thought when I woke up today was, "It's been one year since I graduated from college." A friend remarked yesterday, "I don't know how you can remember that." It's easy, it was May 12, 2012 (the twelve thing makes it easy to remember) and I have it marked on my wrist.
Someone, probably a recent graduate themselves, told me before I graduated that this was going to basically be the worst year of my life. So I prepared for that. I approached this year as if it was going to be horrible, and worked to mitigate the horribleness. Hopefully that would make me happy, or at least less unhappy. Because of this, I thought that once the year had passed there would be a sort of magical lifting. The year would be up.
How in the world has it been a year? Nothing has happened. That's not entirely true, but it feels that way. I will say this about the year being up: I only know it is here, because I have been planning for it. Otherwise, I probably would have looked up from a book next weekend as my friends are graduating across town and think, "Wow, it's been a year since I graduated." If I hadn't been waiting for today, I wouldn't have known because there is no magical lifting. At some point during this year I stopped counting. Living outside of the countdown is a wonderful thing. But, I have found other ways to count this time. During this year I moved three times, watched three whole TV shows (one was Sports Night, so that doesn't really count), administered five practice ACT tests, traveled to Chicago eight times, and read 42 books.
The last one is probably the most important. (Especially since my goal for 2013 is to read 42 books, so this proves that it's possible.) I only had two plans leaving graduation: Don't be miserable and read a lot. In college, you read a lot, but all the fun is gone. You're reading for meaning, or to critique or to pass a class, not because you want to read. I wanted to read whatever I wanted after graduation, and that has been the best thing that I've done for myself. Some of them have been as moving and as powerful as The Ground Beneath Her Feet, one was required, many were by John Green, some were re-read, which I don't do that often. several were gifts and many were passed on. I only gave up on one (Sorry Ethan); Angle of Repose. But many family members love it, so I might give it another try when I'm not keeping watch over an incredibly hot church. During this year I have also made new friends, learned to cook better, even made my bed, but this is they way I choose to measure this year, because it wasn't horrible.
I read: The Handmaid's Tale, Sense and Sensibility, The Shadow of the Wind, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, The Night Circus, Spook, The Invention of Hugo Cabret, Maus 1: My Father Bleeds History, Maus 2: And Here My Troubles Began, Blueprints for Building Better Girls, A Hope in the Unseen, Ella Enchanted, The Enchantress of Florence, The Kissing List, The Angel's Game, An Abundance of Katherines, Good for the Jews, Water for Elephants, The Age of Miracles, The Metamorphosis, Lolita, Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrel, Lizz Free or Die, The Fault in Our Stars, The Book Thief, I'm Starved for You (Positron #1), Choke Collar (Positron #2), Erase Me (Positron #3), We Killed: The Rise of Women in American Comedy, Rules of Civility, Behind the Beatiful Forevers, Feasting and Fasting, Start Here: Read Your Way Into 25 Amazing Authors, Eleanor and Park, How to Be a Woman, Looking for Alaska, Paper Towns, When She Woke, Stupid Perfect World, The Space Between Us, Brave New World, and The Great Gatsby. I am currently reading The Lacuna by Barbara Kingsolver and working on Jews and Words (very slowly).
I have already given my advice in a previous post, so I will just say this:
To the Class of 2012, we did it! We can stop counting!
To my mother, sorry that you haven't been able to smell for a year.
love,
hannah
The second thing I thought when I woke up today was, "It's been one year since I graduated from college." A friend remarked yesterday, "I don't know how you can remember that." It's easy, it was May 12, 2012 (the twelve thing makes it easy to remember) and I have it marked on my wrist.
I had this bracelet made last summer, after a discussion about what we would get tattooed on our bodies. I don't want a tattoo, but I love this quote. It comes from Salman Rushdie's The Ground Beneath Her Feet, mentioned here before. It says "My heart broke open and history fell in." While I like to think that this quote captures something about my college years, I think that it more accurately describes what I hope I will do in the future. This bracelet sits on my wrist with other silver bracelets (recently complimented by one of the secretaries at school) and most of the time I forget about it; it has become a part of my daily uniform. But sometimes I remember this thing which I had made, and it makes me happy.
Someone, probably a recent graduate themselves, told me before I graduated that this was going to basically be the worst year of my life. So I prepared for that. I approached this year as if it was going to be horrible, and worked to mitigate the horribleness. Hopefully that would make me happy, or at least less unhappy. Because of this, I thought that once the year had passed there would be a sort of magical lifting. The year would be up.
How in the world has it been a year? Nothing has happened. That's not entirely true, but it feels that way. I will say this about the year being up: I only know it is here, because I have been planning for it. Otherwise, I probably would have looked up from a book next weekend as my friends are graduating across town and think, "Wow, it's been a year since I graduated." If I hadn't been waiting for today, I wouldn't have known because there is no magical lifting. At some point during this year I stopped counting. Living outside of the countdown is a wonderful thing. But, I have found other ways to count this time. During this year I moved three times, watched three whole TV shows (one was Sports Night, so that doesn't really count), administered five practice ACT tests, traveled to Chicago eight times, and read 42 books.
The last one is probably the most important. (Especially since my goal for 2013 is to read 42 books, so this proves that it's possible.) I only had two plans leaving graduation: Don't be miserable and read a lot. In college, you read a lot, but all the fun is gone. You're reading for meaning, or to critique or to pass a class, not because you want to read. I wanted to read whatever I wanted after graduation, and that has been the best thing that I've done for myself. Some of them have been as moving and as powerful as The Ground Beneath Her Feet, one was required, many were by John Green, some were re-read, which I don't do that often. several were gifts and many were passed on. I only gave up on one (Sorry Ethan); Angle of Repose. But many family members love it, so I might give it another try when I'm not keeping watch over an incredibly hot church. During this year I have also made new friends, learned to cook better, even made my bed, but this is they way I choose to measure this year, because it wasn't horrible.
I read: The Handmaid's Tale, Sense and Sensibility, The Shadow of the Wind, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, The Night Circus, Spook, The Invention of Hugo Cabret, Maus 1: My Father Bleeds History, Maus 2: And Here My Troubles Began, Blueprints for Building Better Girls, A Hope in the Unseen, Ella Enchanted, The Enchantress of Florence, The Kissing List, The Angel's Game, An Abundance of Katherines, Good for the Jews, Water for Elephants, The Age of Miracles, The Metamorphosis, Lolita, Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrel, Lizz Free or Die, The Fault in Our Stars, The Book Thief, I'm Starved for You (Positron #1), Choke Collar (Positron #2), Erase Me (Positron #3), We Killed: The Rise of Women in American Comedy, Rules of Civility, Behind the Beatiful Forevers, Feasting and Fasting, Start Here: Read Your Way Into 25 Amazing Authors, Eleanor and Park, How to Be a Woman, Looking for Alaska, Paper Towns, When She Woke, Stupid Perfect World, The Space Between Us, Brave New World, and The Great Gatsby. I am currently reading The Lacuna by Barbara Kingsolver and working on Jews and Words (very slowly).
I have already given my advice in a previous post, so I will just say this:
To the Class of 2012, we did it! We can stop counting!
To my mother, sorry that you haven't been able to smell for a year.
love,
hannah
Friday, May 10, 2013
Dear chartreuse,
It was once said, "Chartreuse is the color of choice." Or, rather, it was once overheard in a hot dog place. But chartreuse is busting out all over the place! It's exploding from every tree, especially along the river, which has finally stopped feeling gray.
Chartreuse, it's lovely to have you back, even when you're going to be replaced by much deeper hues soon.
love,
hannah
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