Dear spectrum,

Here's how it is: Things are volatile, not always in a scary way, but in the sense that the world can shift beneath you at any second.  What was once solid ground can quickly become uneasy.  And you never know.  It is always a surprise, and I think that's the part that is most uncomfortable.  I cannot anticipate or prepare from moment to moment.

And today, this is the song that's getting me through it.

Tonight we did a spectrum exercise, where you move your body to the place on the spectrum that, for tonight, how you feel about the transition out of college.  And just like that the whole world shook and I wasn't sure of anything.  This is not to sound defeatist, because it is thrilling.  But more than that it can be exhausting.  So I listen to the same song over and over, as I did four years ago with this song and finals.  (I'm sure my mother can remember.) 

So then I come across articles like this and I just burst into tears.  But I have an incredible community of friends, family and teachers to support me, and that's more than I can ask for.  Instead of dwelling on the ever-changing spectrum beneath my feet, I'm going to watch Gossip Girl, and that is going to be okay.  Okay?


love,
hannah