Dear guinea worms,

It's been an interesting day for you.  I know about you thanks to Scott Westerfeld's Peeps (an awesome book!) but now I think I shall be known as "guinea worm girl" to my MWF class.  What a thing to be known for.  Enormously long parasitic worms, right up my alley. 


The coolest part is that the snakes you see in this image - ARE ACTUALLY GUINEA WORMS.  Because you have to twirl them out of the body on a stick.  That's how gross these things are.  But they're so cool... Ah well, I'm famous for them now.

Thanks a lot Naomi.  Your character infested with a guinea worm gives me a weird reputation.  Well, I know how you are about bodies...


love,
hannah

Dear Tom Paine,

This is actually the title of my paper. 

Strangely, I am quite enjoying writing this paper.  However, my fear is this: in an attempt to attack the prompt in a creative manner, I have adopted a haughty and saucy disposition with which to approach contemporary American labor struggles, and while this is useful, I think I have gotten carried away in the character.  I'm having too much fun writing the monologue of this person who thinks the world of Thomas Paine, and I might be forgetting to include the factual elements for which this paper was assigned.  Will this be valuable? Will my sass exemplify the tone that Paine himself utilized? I know not where to stop.  I cannot hold back.  (I've also taken to parading about the house in my red cape (scarf) and claiming myself to be brilliant.  I am brilliant.  That's not the point.)  I have one page left until I have met the length requirement for the assignment, but I fear that it will be lacking in substance, but full of style. 

A solution! Quote Common Sense and bring it all back to the eighteenth century. 

I'm also at that point in writing where I "command + S" all the time.  It means I start trying to save pages on the Internet.  (My typing has gotten fun and flowery this evening.)  At some point I also need to go to bed. 


love,
hannah

Dear first paper of the semester,

You're always a challenge.  You always take three times longer than any other paper. Especially when you're not that hard.  So why am I putting you off? I do everything but prepare for you, when I know you're going to take hours and hours tomorrow.  Why? I should know better.

But not yet. 


love,
hannah

Dear creaky fence,

The fence around our house creaks.  I think it moves back and forth.  Especially when the wind blows.  It's creeping me out. 

I guess I could close the windows in my house.  It is getting a little cold. 

Yeah, that's a good idea.

Today I checked out two books from the library, and as I left the Circulation Desk I wondered whether library employees make note of what books people are checking out.  Can you tell when I've checked out every book on the library on _____? What about when I check out two books that have nothing to do with each other? Do you notice that? If you did, you might find my books interesting.  Also interesting are the bizarre books that colleges have in their library.  A History of American Funeral Directors?  Totally necessary for a solid education.


love,
hannah

Dear day in bed,

At first you were kind of fun.  You know, cause I got to sit in bed and watch Battlestar.  I was gonna drink water and watch tv, but the internet wasn't loading super fast today and I wasn't drinking enough water so I just laid in bed and tried not to move.  Also, in my sick haze this morning I posted on Facebook in such an unintentionally melodramatic manner that people became very concerned for me.  (It's okay friends, I just spent the day in bed.) 

Now that I'm sick and living off campus, I don't remember how I ever handled being sick in the dorms.  Did I spend all day in my loft bed? Did I hope that the dining hall would have soups that weren't too spicy? The other thing I always forget when I'm healthy is how debilitating being sick is.  When I'm healthy and I see sick people, I just want to encourage them to move and maybe that will make them feel better.  That doesn't sound good right now.  I'm trying to do something without moving or making my body want to shiver and/or sweat.  What is this world?

Staying in bed has kind of lost its charm at this point.  I'm ready to be well again.  Also, at this rate I will probably feel better on Monday, but I won't have done any of the homework for Monday.  So then I have a weird hope that I feel so gross that I won't want to go to class on Monday.  (I don't think I've ever not gone to class because of how I felt.)

Also, I'm breathing with my mouth open (duh) and sometimes I let out these tiny little squeaks.  They are pitiful.


love,
hannah

Dear first years,

You don't know how to walk yet.  Especially in the cafeteria.  Don't text, don't apologize, just walk! Look ahead, and walk with purpose, that's all it takes. 

Don't worry, you'll get it eventually.


love,
hannah

Dear fall,

You've arrived in full force! Suddenly it's chilly and I'm debating whether or not I need a jacket when just on Sunday I was sweating all over the place.  To make a comment on the weather in the past year is unnecessary: It's crazy. 

And each new phase of insane weather leads me to believe that the Earth must be changing.  I once asked my father whether there was actually an increase in the number of natural disasters, or whether it just feels like it.  He said that what has changed is the way that the disasters are reported and covered, but in fact each month I feel more sure that he is wrong. 

Although, I can never be sure that earthquakes aren't in fact us crashing into parallel worlds.  (Thanks Salman Rushdie.)  None of that has anything to do with the fact that my house is very excited to be wearing sweaters today.


love,
hannah